23rd Sunday in Ordinary Time (Year A)

Sunday, September 7, 2008
St. Clement’s Catholic Church; Saratoga Springs, NY

Ezekiel 33: 7 – 9
Psalm 95: 1 – 2, 6 – 7, 8 – 9
Romans 13: 8 – 10
Matthew 18: 15 – 20

There is a story about a man named Joe who was dying. For years he had been at odds with Bill, formerly one of his best friends. Wanting to straighten things out, he sent word for Bill to come and see him.

When Bill arrived, Joe told him that he was afraid to go into eternity with such a bad feeling between them. Then, very reluctantly and with great effort, Joe apologized for things he had said and done. He also assured Bill that he forgave him for his offenses. Everything seemed fine until Bill turned to go. As he walked out of the room, Joe called out after him, “But, remember, if I get better, this doesn’t count!”

“But, remember, if I get better, this doesn’t count.” Forgiveness is a wonderful thing to be able to receive and also should be just a wonderful to give. Today, Jesus is talking about what we should do when our brother or sister does something that hurts us. He tells us to summon up the courage and go to them to let them know how their actions have affected us. Most times when I talk to people and they tell me that they could never do this and I ask why they respond by saying that they really do not like confrontation. Well, in reality I don’t know many people who actually enjoy confrontation but today Jesus is saying it is something we have to do.

Jesus has keen insight into human nature. “If your brother sins (against you), go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.” (Matthew 18:15) But if the other person really knew me they never would have done what they did to me. If the other person really loved me they never would have acted as they did. However, the person who has hurt you might not even realize they have done something wrong. We refuse to talk to another and we allow the anger to build inside of us. He let the feelings fester and harbor ill feelings towards another and all the while they might not even know that they have done something hurtful to us.

We are called by Jesus to approach our brother and sister to practice what we often call fraternal correction. We are the ones who are called to make the first move. Often in my past sixteen years of working with seminarians they have come to my office to tell me I need to talk to one of the other seminarians. “They are playing their music too loud in their room.” “They don’t pick up their trash in the TV room.” “They forgot to fill us the car with gas and left it on E.” Then I would ask them if they have brought this up to their fellow seminarian. “Oh, no, I can’t tell him that – I think you should.” To which I would often tell them to go read this Gospel we just heard proclaimed.

None of us want to really go to another and tell them how their actions have hurt us but it is the challenge of the Gospel. When we do there are two qualities we need to bring with us. We should first approach the person in humility. If we go in with a superior attitude, acting as if we are the chief judge we will never get the other person to even listen to us. We must also approach the other with love. Going to another to tell them how they have wronged us is an effort to build up the body of Christ. We go to another to be re-united with them so that we can live as members of the Church. If we go to another without humility and love then we will never be reconciled to one another. The walls that exist between us will just become stronger and harder to tear down. The challenge of Jesus is present. “If your brother sins (against you), go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.” (Matthew 18:15) Tough words but necessary is we are to live together as God’s family.

There was a preacher whose Sunday sermon was about forgiving your enemies. He asked, “How many have forgiven their enemies?” About half held up their hands. He then repeated the question. Now about 80% held up their hands. He then repeated his question again. All responded, except one elderlylady. "Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" asked the preacher. "I don’t have any." she replied. "Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?" asked the preacher. "Ninety-nine." she replied. "Mrs. Jones, please come down in front and tell the congregation how a person cannot have an enemy in the world." asked the preacher. The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, and said, "It’s easy, I just outlived all of them."

Hopefully we won’t be like Mrs. Jones and simply outlive our enemies. Hopefully we reach out to them in humility and love. There is also a flip side to this message. At times we will be the one that have wronged another. That is a reality since we who make up the Church are all saints and sinners. There will be a day when someone will approach us to tell us how we have hurt them. We must be open to hearing them. We might not even realize that our actions have been harmful. When another comes to us we must respond with those two virtues I mentioned earlier: with humility and love. We have to be a person who can listen to another as they call us to live a better Christian life. We might think that our actions are not hurtful but in the eyes of another we may have done them great harm. Living the challenging message of Christ means we have to be open to fraternal correction as well as being able to give it. None of us is perfect and there are times when we need to know when we have sinned.

None of this is easy. It seems as if the recent words of Jesus in these Sunday Gospels have been extremely difficult. They are words we need to reflect on and strive to live. We are a people who need to approach our brother and sister to let them know when they have harmed us. We are a people who need to be open to another when we have wronged them. This is what it means to be a disciple of Jesus Christ. This is what it means to have heard his words and put them into action.

The Good News is that he is there to help us. The last line of the Gospel today offers us hope. “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.” (Matthew 18:20) When we approach our brother or sister we do not go to them alone. He is in our midst as we fraternally correct another. He is in our midst when another approaches us to tell us how we have wronged them. The words of Christ are easier to live when we realize we are not there alone.

That is also why we come to the Eucharist, so we can receive the strength we need to live out his words. He not only offers us these challenging words but says he will come to us to be our support and strength. AMEN!